Pain or Pleasure

It's not easy to go on in life and not have definitive answers. If you ever wonder where the money will come from to pay bills or how you'll pay for the groceries or maybe you need a few extra bucks for this or that. Maybe you're not sure about a current relationship or job situation or maybe your car doesn't seem right. Whatever the case, not having definitive answers can really put a wrench in your day, week, month or even year! The reallity is that there are definitive answers to life's toughest questions. I find myself questioning everything. I realize that less and less am I trusting people. It seems that I have lost faith in people. I cringe when I see a person approaching me that I have a hard time trusting. Mostly because their motives are strictly self seeking. I understand that people are people. That's life. But what about long time, "mature" believers. Are they just people? Should they have a different perspective on life and the "I wants"? Where does, "Dying to self" enter in the thought process. I'm by no ways innocent, but I make great attempts to humility for the sake of Christ. I, in no way, want to get in the way of what God wants and is going to do in the lives of people whom He puts in my path. I feel extreme disappointment when an older saint of the faith comes to me seeking personal preference in order to fulfill their "walk" with Christ. Maybe my perspective is off, but as a Christian, my walk and the depth of my relationship with God isn't dependant on a Pastor's message, worship leading, prayer, or whatever. My walk is up to me. It is the desires of my heart and how deep I can go when worshipping my Savior, my King and my Father. Church is a 1 hour a week assembly of believers for learning and being equipped. Some will come to know Him through that and will learn by attending weekly services, but in the grand scheme of things, a Believer will only strengthen his/ her relationship, with God if they want to. So, when a long time Christian enters a worship service the thought should be, what will I learn today and how will I be equipped in order to fulfill the great commandment. Never should the thought be, what will the Church service do to please me. If you've read this far, then let me say this in closing, go to church desiring to gain and not be pleased. Learning is hard and sometimes painful. We all need refining in order to be like HIM. That's the one definitive answer to life's toughest questions...HIM...Jesus! Be like HIM!